For my DAD

"All the these line across my face tell you the story who I am
So many stories of where I have been but this story don't mean
anything if I got no one to tell it true"


Been some days that I have decided to quit my job and chase my dream however I'm living some part of dream but my main purpose was drifting away from what it was to be. It's hard decision to quit as I know my folks has huge monetary constraint which also make me think that whether I'm a failed child of theirs?? They have always support in whatever I do even my hard time when I was lost after my graduation in which I want to start my career in film and people(read relative) were against me, during the time everybody was against my act even one whom I have loved dearly as I could not decide what to do I shave off my hair and dad which is very soft as compare to my mom went to the biggest director of my place through a friend of his and beg him to make me his assistants and after that I drop my Master degree and started my film career. I would say I was doing good and Dad ask me to go for some school so as to upgrade my knowledge and I went to FTII for some month course. I'm not talking about mom much because she never spoke about my career as she believe I should be one responsible getting what I want to do however it is strange that my relation with dad is not as open as my mom but he is the one who have done everything for me and mom. Once he cried when we came to know Mom was diagnose with carcinoma but he dint show it to me he wipe his tears off. I trembled but I dint because if I cried Dad will become weak cry but inside I was crying my heart out. Many time dad had cried he cried when my friend came over to my place in their own vehicle, he cried when I wear only one pairs of pants and some t-shirt and dad is still crying yet he manage to smile, I never called dad because all this things make me cry and I was also one of the reason I feel guilty toward my dad. I have hurt him many time still he support me and now I'm going to hurt him again and he is supporting again yet he manage to smile.

Am I a bad son?

Dad I love you. I never tell you that. Once when you send me a sms saying "Nanao, I love you", I was so happy that I cried that night. Sorry for whatever I done to you and going to do it to you again. I have decided to come back and I know you don't want me to because you feel that I'm be embarrassed in front of my friend because we don't even have our own home. I know that you don't want me to face the humiliations that you have faced. Dad I need you now. I want to be with you under your shadow. This is for you Dad,
I LOVE YOU